Cat From Hell. True story, this one got out. Dont know how. Sorry!

Still rather listen to it than Justin Bieber. 

Strangest Google Earth/Maps images!

These are some of the weirdest Google images out there.  Some are from space and some are from the google map cars but all are odd or flat out weird. 

"Why didnt they do me BEFORE I gained that weight back??!"

 

Angel scoping things out?

What are the odds?

"I dont know what you smell Mom! We're going out now"

Yep, told ya they were real

I'd like to say this is the road to Hell, but alas, this is the one to Heaven

One of our 3-legged demons on patrol. He let it slip out before slipping into his flat to go watch Dancing with the Stars

Seconds later a woman found a pile of what looked like lost laundry on the sidewalk.

Can you find the car that is defying gravity?

"Dude, you gotta see my new ride. Its like 0-600 is 7.8 seconds"

Vatican tries to defend itself to Supreme Court, but denied in Child abuse.

and Child abuse only this year...

You love to find out the inside information and gossip about whose coming to Hell next and where they’ll be staying when they get here.  Some like you will be in great neighborhoods with hip restaurants and shops living great afterlives, and others will as I say so often “Go deeper”. 

I cant comment on this because I have inside information that cant be leaked yet, but this news story is about the Vatican.   

Child abuse is ranked by Sin Digest as the worst of all sins edging out murder only because of the longer lasting ramifications on the victim, and the combination of adding another sin together with it.  “Treason” is the circle of Hell you go to when you abuse great trust.  Child abusers, and rapists very nearly never just jump on a kid randomly.  Usually they take days, months and sometimes years of grooming to get the child to ‘agree’ to engage in sex with them. 

Child abusers and those who protect them go to the deepest parts of Hell, and stay there for the longest times, this is a fact I can tell you.  Others who go deeper, can work their ways back up over time, much like a probation system or complete their punishment and surface to begin again.  Mentally, they’re never the same, but thats their problem.  We have a system of punishment just like you do.  Ours lasts infinitely longer is so much harsher as to be unexplainable but its the same idea.   

A new story in the AP (Link below) tells us that the Supreme Court wont stop a lawsuit that accuses the Vatican of transferring a priest from city to city despite repeated accusations of sexual abuse.     

The Vatican wants the federal courts to throw out the lawsuit that seeks to hold the Roman Catholic Church responsible for moving the Rev. Andrew Ronan from Ireland to Chicago to Portland despite the sex abuse accusations. 

We are left with a conundrum that asks where blame begins and ends and what degree is left on accomplices.  Those who drive the cars for bank robbers are locked up regularly.  Offer a brother assistance to escape after he commits murder and you are going to jail.  We have a system in the US that punishes those who aid in crimes even if they didn’t do the crime themselves. 

I know whats going to happen here.  Its happened before, but we have a gag order on us to speak of it.  All I can say is “Hmmmm”

Struck by Lightning

This is what happens when you get hit by lightning, that is if you live. He ended up with the hottest tattoo of all time, a lightning pattern down his back. Top that. If you don’t live well you may end up like this:

Copyright ©2010 Pandemonium Real Estate. All Rights Reserved.

Mariah Carey gets ‘it’ doggy style from Vet.

Ouch thats gotta hurt

 

Mariah Carey is being sued for $38,000 by her vet who said she gave Mariahs three dogs extraordinary care while the star was down in LA promoting her movie Precious. The unnamed Vet, who is coming to Hell by the way, says only $8,000 has been collected so far. 

What I’m wondering is, what the vet did for these dogs for whatever amount of time it was that Carey was gone to be worth that insane amount of money?  I have to think here and try to be fair to the Vet.  What could  be done to three dogs to rack up a $38K bill.  First we need to break it down and get an idea of what we’re talking about.  If the Vet rented his entire practice out for the entire month and saw no other animal however small and charged her $38K, assuming he/she says thats the monthly average, then the Vet is making $460,000 per year.  If Mariah left her dogs with the vet for over two months (unlikely I’m sure you’d agree but lets be as fair to the vet as we can) then each dog would cost Carey $200 per day.  That’s $600 per day for the three of them.  Is this realistic?

For $600 dollars a day I could take a vacation in Sedona, stay at an exclusive spa for $300 per night, have $150 per day to spend on food, and still have enough for a daily massage.  Cut out three massages per week over that two month period and I’d have Dom with every dinner, or would be playing golf every morning. 

I realize that vets probably charge more to stars, but there are limits to my ability to allow a star to be overcharged for something without sounding the alarm.  Especially from someone claiming to be a Dr.  I give one caveat to this argument, and only one.  If in fact this is true, the Dr will still be coming to Hell, but will be getting a much nicer property.  If the Dr charges $200 per night, per dog to everybody then we have nothing to complain about. 

One problem left here however with our assumtion is that we all know she didn’t leave for a solid two months.  So lets assume two weeks which is probably closer.  At two weeks the daily bill for three dogs with the exceptional care of this Vet would be $2,714  or  $904.76 per dog per night.  Almost $3K per night.  What could you do for two weeks with $3K a night? 

I cant divulge the Dr’s name, because it hasn’t been made public, but I have it.  This Dr is coming to Hell. 

Syndra

are you coming?

Welcome the Anti-Rape condom. Porn meets the Crusades.

Holy chinese torture devices

 

Introducing the first ever rape deterrent, that is designed to be worn at all times, but used only during the penetration of a rape.  This image shows it in reverse so imagine those horrible barbs on the inside.  Now imagine placing it inside, exactly like you would expect to, and if any man tries something that you cant stop, his Johnson will slip in, but wont ever come out…of the device, not you.  The barbs will lodge themselves all around the man, causing excruciating pain, and will be nearly impossible to remove without the aid of a Dr.  Movement will apparently also cause the device to cinch itself down on the mans now flaccid member so escape and retaliation would be minimized. 

Two sides have emerged on this issue, as they do on everything these days, even whether or not I should change my underwear.  One side says hooray, men will think twice about what they are doing if there is something like this widely enough spread that he may accidentally fall victim to it.  The other side says; no, women dont need this device which will just make them feel vulnerable more often.  Make them feel more like victims who are simply living in fear. 

Consider the place where its being introduced, for about $2 a piece…South Africa.  Rapes there are prevalent and the convictions are rare.  Having one on hand for those times where you’re out late, in a shading part of town but not on a date while drinking makes sense.  (You wouldn’t want to forget this would you? ) Load yourself up, grab your pepper spray and you have both a solid offense and a nasty defence lined up.  Add a solid steel chastity belt with a key stored in a safety deposit box and your set for any environment. 

I’m for it.  Those who feel afraid, can wear it.  They would feel afraid anyway and it might give them some piece of mind and if even one guy loses his southern blood flow imagining the possibility and goes home rather than jumping on a woman or a girl, then its a good idea.  I say buy one.  Buy two and hand the other out. 

More info at the RapeX website.  http://www.antirape.co.za/

Syndra

are you coming…?

Orlando Bloom and Miranda Kerr engaged.

27 year old and Victoria’s Secret Australian supermodel Miranda Kerr (I hope she was fat and ugly in middle school), is now engaged to 33 year old Pirates Star Orlando Bloom.  Pirates 4 filming now BTW, last seen filming on Kauai in Hawaii. 

Not much of a story here, but there is a moral.  If you’re a six, look for sixes, if your a nine, stick with nines, but dont ever think for a second you’re a ten.  If you’re a ten, you’re a multi millionaire on your own, you didn’t do it on a pole or on your back, and you get asked out by nice superstars like this.  Just sayin..

Syndra

are you coming?

“Iceman” Val Kilmer is guilty of…gluttony. BANG

Well, being rich and 50 does have its rewards...

This really doesn’t look great, but hey he’s made his money, and has done more in his first thirty than you or I will do ever.  I think we can let some things slide especially since he has.  I kinda wish more men looked like this.  I’d get a lot more done.  Still Val looks a lot better than….

Holy mother of...I think I saw a mouse run down his pants. Somebody help him!

Both will spend some time in the circle for Gluttony for sure, but Val will at least have the Dad-dish look going for him rather than the grease-ball Guido Sarducci look as we see above.  There really should be a sin for just looking so horrid, but alas, I checked.  There isn’t. 

Syndra

are you coming?

While in jail man is killed and eaten, in France. I thought they had better food in France.

 

A Frenchman went on trial Monday for allegedly killing his prison cellmate and then slicing open his chest to remove and consume his heart — but eating his lung by mistake. 

He attacked his cell mate by punching, kicking, and stabbing him him with scissors, then finished him off with a trash bag, all of which must have made no noise at all.  Then whilst the prison was presumably asleep, or distracted by landing 747’s, he cut open the now dead mans chest, and pulled out what he believed to be the mans heart and container of ‘his soul’.  “I wanted to take his soul” Cocaign said.  Cocaign was on trial for a simple armed robbery at the time.  Apparently anatomy class had been cancelled the day before because he ate the mans lung instead.  Partially raw, and the rest cooked in a small pan with onions. 

Strange enough the prisoner killed and ate part of his cellmate, stranger still it was a Frenchman, but strangest of all, was that he had in his cell a pair of scissors, a razor blade, a trash bag, a portable fire, the type you’d take camping, a pan, and please dont forget the onion.

60 foot Jesus Statue destroyed by lightning. Good shooting or bad luck?

We had nothing to do with this...I swear.

MONROE, Ohio – A six-story-tall statue of Jesus Christ with his arms raised along a highway was struck by lightning in a thunderstorm Monday night and burned to the ground, police said.

One of Ohio’s most famous landmarks, the others included old men on porches in rocking chairs, and skeet shooters, the 62 foot, 40 foot wide statue was completely destroyed.  Made of a wire sub, covered in plastic, foam,  and fiberglass over a steel frame the statue burned and spread to a nearby amphitheater.  No one was hurt but the statue cost almost $250,000 to create and was financed by the pastor and his wife. 

I know someone in that church is blaming us today.  “Hell has released its demons on us, but we will not be a’feared.  We will stand tall and rebuild”  But I promise, we had nothing to do with it.  Reporters down here have interviewed every official and no one admitted to knowing anything about it all.  Chalk this one up to a six story steel frame, that wasn’t properly grounded being fried in a lightning storm.  Stuff happens and when its put that way it seems likely that it would have.

Syndra

are you coming?

Kardashian and Bieber together at last. The Mayans had it right, this is it!

Kardashian and Bieber together

Fresh from a concert and a day of doing what Kardashians always do...

 

Justin Bieber and Kim Kardashian were seen playing together at The Cove at Atlantis in the Bahamas after a Bieber concert.  Clearly witchcraft has been played by the Kardashian sisters.  Their life is just better than any three ugly sisters should expect.  I do wonder what they’d look like if it weren’t for the spells they cast either on themselves or on all of us.  Every time I see a “Pagan” bumper-sticker on the rusted bumper of a 1982 mint green Volvo, I think to myself.  I think; “Future multi millionaire model”

Syndra

are you coming?

Bush supports Obama Health care plan on Fox. A fairy tale that includes Shrek?

Barbara Bush and daddy GW

Appearing on Fox New Sunday Barbara Bush, daughter of GW Bush, was speaking of her non profit Global Health Corps when she was asked what she thought of President Obama’s Health care plan. 

“What do you think about Obama health care reform?” Wallace asked.

“Obviously the health care reform bill was highly debated by a lot of people,” Bush responded., “and I’m glad the bill was passed.”

Huh.  It appears the leftist, socialist, ideologues have infiltrated the Bush family and captured and indoctrinated another cult member.  I wonder if she’ll have her head shaved next.  Maybe go door to door handing out chains and asking people to attach one end of themselves and the other ends to trees.  Or could be she just realized the system was already broken and a change, however lacking was better than nothing at all.  Way to buck the fam!

Syndra

are you coming?

January Jones of Mad Men slams Range Rover and flees scene on foot.

January Jones wearing morning clothes from the night before. Hmmm.

The story you’ll see is January Jones from Mad Men, lost control of her Range Rover and slammed into three parked cars.  She then fled the scene on foot where witnesses heard her say “I just cant handle the commotion”.  Sounds like somethings afoot doesn’t it?

The devil in the details here is that the Paparazzi had begun trailing her, distracting her enough that she ran into some parked cars.  Police have already said there was no evidence of alcohol and since she called 911 once she got home to report it herself, there wont be a hit and run charge either. 

Something she had done, was just embarrassing enough that she didn’t want the paparazzi to photo her.  Just enough to distract her from what she was doing, not unlike when you text a msg while driving.  Distracted driving itself is a crime, but not when a pack of hyenas are trailing you hungry for your achilles tendon. 

Paparazzi have a place here in hell.  No doubt about it.  Not as bad as you’d think, there are worse, but still not waterfront.  They’ll be here when you get here. 

Syndra

are you coming?

Dr Murray goes to his first Hearing on the death of Michael Jackson. Here’s the behind the scenes story.

Dr. Murray, Michael Jackson’s personal Dr. has made his defense known in the death of Michael Jackson.  Dr Murray claims that he had given Michael propanol, but only enough to sleep for 5-10 minutes.  His claim was that he was on the phone with his girlfriend in the room with Michael as Michael was trying to fall asleep.  According to the Dr Michael often tried to sleep with lights on, cartoons blaring and commotion in the room.  I’m not sure which medical college the Dr went to, but eliminating all of that from the room, might have been a better alternative to sleep than propanol, but hey I’m a dead girl who never finished college.  I’m just sayin’.

The Dr then claims that while he went to the bathroom, still on the phone with his girlfriend (Boyfriends, please don’t do that), Michael suddenly woke up, got frustrated with being unable to sleep and injected himself with the rest of the bottle of propanol, which killed him.  Michael Jackson killed himself on accident. 

This is the defence of the good Dr. 

His first hearing is now expected to be attended by pastors from many local churches, over a 1000 people who support him, and Congresswoman Shelia Jackson Lee.  Why I don’t know.

Michael Jackson was loony by every standard under the sun and for years these same people chanted child abuser, which he probably was.  His music however is so fantastic, and his personality so childlike, we miss him.  We really just wanted to punish him, have him recover from everything and keep on keepin on.  His death was a major bummer for all of us, especially us down here.  Somehow we didn’t get him.  He might be on loan to the big guy upstairs for some period of time, I don’t know, but I can tell you that he has not made an appearance here, although he does have property that is being kept up for him. 

Without being able to speak with him personally I cant interview him to determine who was really responsible for his death.  Sorry, I’m as in the dark as you are, but in my opinion it was the Dr’s fault.  Not intentional, not murder, but the blame goes to the Dr for accidental overdose.  Watch the trial and see how it comes out.

Sin of Glutony: Mother of 2 wants to GAIN weight… A LOT of weight. Huh??

This is what bean bag chairs were made for

Donna Simpson of New Jersey has a goal and her goal is to create the worst possible life, for herself and her family, she can and live it in the shortest amount possible by eating herself into the Guinness Book of World Records.  She currently has eaten enough crap to add blubber weighing approximately 540lbs which is just over half of where she wants to be.  One thousand lbs is her goal!  Damn, if lazy becomes an Olympic sport I swear I’ll end your puny world.  I swear I will. 

Her husband, who weighs a modest 189lbs is said to be in full support.  That has to be crap because Im betting the floor can barely support her at this point and as soon as he realized that her world record laziness will make him and his kids clean between her fat rolls because she cant get out of bed, Im guessing he’s off this titanic.  Fat girls are great and the best part is they are a dime a dozen.  Problem is they are pickier than he is.  He wouldn’t have a chance with any of my friends.   

Currently she earns a living by…wait for it……modeling.  Sigh.  Yes I said modeling.  She poses for websites where, presumably men, pay money to look at really large women.  Sans clothes?  I dont have the stomach to check.  www.supersizedbombshells.com You can if you haven’t eaten yet today.

Shania Twain steals husband from girl who stole her husband. Marie-Anne Theibaud

Trade your shoes with a friend, a pair of jeans, but a Husband Swap?

Here’s the deal

                     Pay attention because you may have to go back an re-read this real slow to get it all if you dont.  Shania Twain was married to Mutt Lange.

Mutt...I know the pun is too easy to even bother typing...

Shania also had a best friend named Marie-Anne Thiebaud;

Uhm, I thought guys were into looks and only looks...must be more to this package.

Shania, lastly has a child with said husband Mutt.  No photo required because the kid has nothing to do with this Clue-like mystery.  Marie-Anne stole Shania’s husband blanketing our Internet-waves with tears of passion from and understandably upset Shania.  Who wouldn’t be…except he looked like a dog and acted like one, but hey, rationality has never been our best suit has it? 

Shania has now been seen with Marie-Anne’s husband(first photo), and the drama has now come full circle in what could only be called, were it civil, a husband swap.  Was it civil?  I dont know.  Sorry.  For all I know all four of them were ‘experimenting’ in hotel rooms and hatched this long drawn out plot to make the partner switch permanent.  We dont know…yet.  I have some demons on the case however.  Here’s the re-cap. Shania was with Mutt, but Marie-Anne, Shania best friend, is now with Mutt.  Marie-Anne was with, and still kinda is, with Frederic Theibaud, but now Marie is with Mutt and Shania is with Frederic but neither Shania nor Marie-Anne are friends with one another.  Does anyone have a scorecard?

Syndra

are you coming?

Danielle Staub, Jerseys most hated housewife, has a sex tape. Oh really!

Oh goodie bubbles and porn, my favorite.

Danielle Staub is the next self made porn star we will have to endure.  Hustler video has just announced that it will be releasing a 75 minute video of Danielle, New Jerseys most hated housewife, ‘playing’ with an unnamed friend.

 75 minutes!!??  Uhm, thats like an hour and a half!  I dont know if I’m outraged over another sex tape being released or jealous that she caught that marathon on film.  I wonder if I’ll learn any new moves….

Syndra

are you coming?

Joran Van der Sloot confessed to murder. Faces 35 years. After that his real punishment begins.

The girls and I told you.

NBC news just broke with the story that Joran Van der Sloot confessed to the killing of Stepheny Florez in a Peru casino hotel room.  Joran told a Peru newspaper that he killed her because she grabbed his laptop that contained information about his killing of Natalee Holloway. 

“I didn’t want to do it. The girl intruded into my private life… she didn’t have any right. I went to her and I hit her. She was scared, we argued and she tried to escape. I grabbed her by the neck and hit her.”

The girls and I just finished having a party last night and the drinks were on me.  Stepheny, Natalee and a bunch of my friends all went for happy hour to celebrate this turds confession.  Although being caught in Peru means a lighter sentence than it would in the US, only a max of 35 years, we can be pretty sure he will arrive here soiled and ready for his REAL punishment to begin. 

That’s going to be another celebration day for us.  Till then I’m getting them settled in their new spots.  Both received waterfront properties, as do all deserving murder victims.  The spots are gorgeous and the neighborhoods marvelous.  They will love where their at. 

Syndra

are you coming?

 

 

Twilight The New moon and the numerological meaning of the number 5

Twilight New Moon  just won you probably know already an amazing 5 awards at the MTV 2010 movie awards also winning the most prestigious of the awards “Best Movie”.  What I’m sure you also all know is that there are no accidents in this world, only destiny and messages to be deciphered and here we have no exception.  Five awards…what could the meaning be behind winning Five, and not four or six?  Is there any universal information that can be gleaned from this?  Any hidden meaning built into the structure of the movie releases, the characters or the universe…? Of course there is. 

“Five” happens to be, according to http://www.ridingthebeast.com/numbers/nu5.php the number of harmony and balance.  Here are some quotes that give you an good feel but you can read the rest if you need to. 

The number 5 is a characteristic of the man. First, according to the Cabal, it is the number of the perfect Man (got rid(sic) from his animal side). According to the Bible, it is the symbol of the Man-God by the five wounds of the Christ on cross (for this reason, it is also considered as the number of the grace). But it is also associated to the man in general (2 + 3) having an unstable character of duality, 2, in spite of his divinity, 3. The 5 is also found on the human body: the five fingers of the hand and feet, the five senses (touch, taste, sense of smell, hearing and the sight), the five members (two arms, two legs and the head, the bust being the center), the five bones forming the metacarpus, the metatarse and the brain-pan, etc.

Considered as the mediator between God and the universe, the five is regarded as a symbol of the universe.

Symbol of the will’s divine.

Symbol of the perfection in the Mayas.

Symbol of the incarnated conscience – 4, Matter, + 1, Spirit.

Symbolize the force and the limits of the man in his control on the Universe.

Ahem…blah, blah, blah

———————————————————————————-

We will further notice that in his blog http://danielheydon.com/blog4/2010/01/25/stephenie-meyer-numerology-twilight-2/  The date of the article that he wrote about the movie was January 25, 2010 where 2+5 equal 10, and 10 being twice that of the awards won of the 2nd movie.  Even more proof that there is something here we notice that the photo was taken on April 5th, 2009 where April the 4th month, plus the 5th day equal 9 as in 2009.  See the patterns here?  The book was also published on 10/5/2005.  That one is so easy I dont have to break it down at all do I?  In addition Edward was born in May, the 5th month and From H.- P. Blavatsky, “5 is the spirit of life and human love which describes Edward perfectly.  Amazing!

Go ahead and check out more from the above links and have some fun discovering your own connections.  I neglected to use the letters 1-26 to look for clues, but I’m sure there are some.  Sadly, my boss Spice is needing production out of me.  Back to settling souls in their new properties. 

Are you coming?

Syndra

The Devil made me do it. Hot women with dogs.

It has to be asked…

           why would such amazingly hot and intelligent women date or marry such turds?  Could it simply be that there is more to these men than meets the eye?  Could it be that if one of these women happened to walk by a Boys and Girls club while her soon to be new husband was coaching girls volleyball, rather than swimming off his 3.2 million dollar yacht she would have fallen in love just as quick?  Uhm, well sure.  I guess.  But you wouldn’t.  So whats the comparison to men.  Is there one?  Would a guy date for any length of time a toad of a woman.  Angry, mean, smelly and ugly just because she was rich?  Hmm I cant think of any, but I’m sure the example exists somewhere. 

The question here is what is the difference between the gals in these photos and you.  Besides their sixteen thousand dollar dresses and seven hundred dollar shoes.  Its their mindset their ability to swallow anything, sadly I mean anything.  This is their way of ‘working’ nights and weekends on a side business to get ahead.  What makes them different from you isn’t much different than whats between a porn king and the guy living next door.  He may watch porn but to get involved in the seedy life making it and living it…no.  Not his cup of tea.  He’d rather muddle by as a postman and have his dignity.  Dignity is the key here.  Some can live without it and some cant.  Some can sue over a spilled cup of coffee (what was her name) and some feel that Karma is too important to mess with and that life rewards those who live well.  Not with shoes, but hopefully something. 

Bottom line is all of these women can really look back on their lives and truthfully say, as they watch their soulless lives drift into oblivion…The Devil made me do it.